From Dave at Treasured Relationships; September 26, 2016


Special Announcement: Radio Interviews

Listen in today!
Via the internet, follow this link:
Or, you can dial in directly to listen live at this number: (646) 668-8921.
And, in case you can’t listen live, I will be sending you a link to the recording.

What an exciting week this is for Treasured Relationships! I have not one, but three radio interviews this week. They will be Monday (TODAY!), Wednesday, and Friday at 12:00 Noon (Eastern US Time Zone). The overall subject for the 3 radio shows is: “Gain Marital Fulfillment and Joy, Without the Need for Counseling”. And today’s topic is: “The First Step to a Fulfilling Christian Marriage.”

The hostess of the show is author and business coach Louise Crooks. She lives and works in New Jersey, but is British and was raised in South Africa. So she has an interesting accent that you will enjoy listening to. I got to know Louise because of her work with helping small business owners get started and grow their businesses. We have spoken many times, and she invited me to be a part of her “Business Springboard” radio show because she believes others should know about my exciting work. So these interviews won’t follow her typical business-oriented emphasis; since Relationship Coaching is a unique business to start with plus the fact that my approach is distinctly a faith-based ministry.

At the start she will introduce me and ask questions about how I came to be doing this work. Then Louise will ask me questions based on what I’ve submitted to her as well as other questions she may have. So here’s a summary of the material I sent her for today’s show:

Marriage is something we DO. So think of the word “marriage” as a verb. We all get married expecting and wanting to have a wonderful relationship with this person we have chosen to do marriage with.

However . . . problems arise when we don’t know what to do to build a strong and fulfilling marital relationship. The couple ends up doing stuff that will never lead to a fulfilling long-term marriage. If this was a dance, their dance steps simply don’t work very well. They keep trying those same dance steps over and over until they get frustrated, give up, and get a divorce.

Then they are each likely to choose another “dance partner” while thinking that changing partners will solve the problem. Unfortunately, doing something the wrong way over and over does not teach one how to do it the right way. So, with new partners, they each try the same dance moves all over again and are surprised to end up having the same results.

There is a much better solution, and it does not require changing partners. The approach I’ve developed teaches couples how to do this dance called marriage in such a way that their original intentions and dreams for the relationship become a reality throughout their lives together.

There is a step they must take, however, even before beginning the process of becoming skilled at the “dance” we call marriage. The very first step is to decide to learn to do the dance correctly. This decision is a pivotal moment for the couple. Until they make a conscious decision to intentionally change their old patterns, it is highly unlikely that there will be any significant changes. And closely related to this decision is to find someone who can guide them through a change process to establish more effective patterns of relating.

The process I lead people through is Biblically based, future focused, and action oriented. The focus is on doing specific things in the present that will take them to the future of their dreams. They learn specific relationship skills (related to communication, problem solving, conflict resolution, etc.) and strategies for keeping the positive things of marriage alive and well (fun, friendship, sensuality, etc.). They come to understand God’s purpose for their marriage, and the instructions God gives in how to experience a tremendously fulfilling relationship with each other.

There is no counseling or therapy involved in the entire process. And I hope that Louise will give me an opening to explain why this is true.

This unique approach to helping marriages thrive is a combination of the best features of Marriage Enrichment, Marriage Education, and Relationship Coaching. And this gives couples the “dance moves” they need to have absolutely fantastic marriages that are characterized by openness, honesty, mutual respect, teamwork, and unity. Their mental, emotional, spiritual, and physical connections are strengthened. Romance and oneness begin to come naturally.

There is no one-size-fits-all formula to bring about these changes because each couple is unique in certain ways. However, the program is easily “tweaked” to address those unique concerns and challenges. And this is a process, not a 1 day event that fixes everything right away. But it is also not something that goes on and on forever. For most couples, the process takes somewhere between 4 and 9 months, depending on where they are at the start and what their goals are for their future together. Their first major transitions typically come in 3 to 6 weeks, after which the process gets easier and easier until they no longer need the guidance and assistance of their coach. This is most certainly a positive alternative to the painful road of divorce.



You can email me privately at with any questions, comments, etc. Or go to the website and book a time for us to talk on the phone (or internet). Simply select one of my available time slots, and I will send you the details of how we can connect live. I meet this way with people around the U.S. and in several other countries. So it really doesn’t matter how far away you are from Wilmington, NC. I am here to serve you, and I wish you well.





Please tell others about Treasured Relationships! If you know anyone who might be able to benefit from this ministry, ask them to check us out on the website. I work from an office in Wilmington, NC; but the days of having to travel for appointments are over.  I've embraced technology that makes this ministry more effective and more convenient at the same time.


Welcome to new members of the Treasured Relationships community!

I send the Treasured Relationships newsletter to you twice each month, plus occasional special announcements. I promise to not fill up your inbox all the time. I hope you will stick with us, and that you will find the content beneficial. I also hope that you will allow us to help you as needed, and encourage others you know to get plugged in as well. I personally answer all email, so send me your questions, thoughts, concerns, suggestions, whatever. But, of course, you can unsubscribe at any time and your request will be honored.

Your contact information is never shared, period. I hate spam just as much as you do. If there is something that I think you would appreciate, I may suggest that you sign up for it and can provide the link in this newsletter.

Dave Wilder

Treasured Relationships LLC: "Helping couples relate well, build fulfilling relationships and experience marriage as God designed it to be!"